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Christmas Cracker Jokes 2010

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Author Topic: Christmas Cracker Jokes 2010  (Read 715 times)
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cobblersareus
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« on: December 22, 2010, 15:20:45 pm »

When I was a young lad, my mum & dad made me walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog.
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Deepcut Cobbler
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« Reply #1 on: December 23, 2010, 18:33:19 pm »

The worse the better..... Tongue

What does a cat lay its head on when it goes to sleep?
A caterpillow.

What horse only sleeps at night?
A nightmare

What happened to the man who dreamed that he was eating a giant marshmallow?
When he woke up, his pillow was gone.

Doctor, Doctor I am having trouble sleeping at night.
Lie on the edge of your wardrobe, you will soon drop off.

Why did the man put his bed in the fireplace?
So he could sleep like a log.

Why is a river lazy?
Because it never leaves it's bed.

Why are you late for work?
There are eight in our family and the alarm clock was set for seven.

What question can never be answered with YES?
Are you asleep?


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“They shall grow not old as we that are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We will remember them.” Laurence Binyon

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cobblersareus
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« Reply #2 on: December 23, 2010, 20:57:55 pm »

The worse the better..... Tongue

What happened to the man who dreamed that he was eating a giant marshmallow?
When he woke up, his pillow was gone.



When that happened to me, I never found the giant marshmallow that was on my bedside table.
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cobblersareus
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« Reply #3 on: December 23, 2010, 21:01:21 pm »

Velcro............. WHAT A RIP OFF!!!!!!
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cobblersareus
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« Reply #4 on: December 23, 2010, 21:04:30 pm »

How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb?


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cobblersareus
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« Reply #5 on: December 23, 2010, 21:09:27 pm »

My goldfish is a weatherman, I put sunglasses on him and call him......
 MY COOL FISH
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cobblersareus
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« Reply #6 on: December 23, 2010, 21:11:59 pm »

Ten cats in a boat, one jumps out, how many are left?
 
None, all the rest are copy cats.
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cobblersareus
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« Reply #7 on: December 23, 2010, 21:14:13 pm »

Where do you put a dog that's making a noise in the street?

IN A BARKING LOT
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« Reply #8 on: December 24, 2010, 00:38:51 am »

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