Carl Fletcher sacked by Leyton...
Get him in, quick. He is brilliant, and will play Barcelona football, whilst instilling the squad with that winning mentality that we have missed in the games that we haven't won. He will magically ensure that every player is 100% fit for every game, stronger in the tackle than every other player in the league, faster than every other player in the league, has no outside issues that may affect their performance..... AND.... cut the playing budget by 50%.
At the same time he will get on board sponsors who will give us a 50,000 capacity ground by the end of season. It will be owned by fans & so self funding that supporters will no longer need to pay entrance fee for any game. Carr's Bar will dispense free magic juice. In fact, every contributor to this message board will be due a £5k bonus for being ace ---- and all that after just 8 months of his reign.
Fletcher in.... Curle out!